On the Russian adoption forum right now there is a thread that both enlightens and infuriates me. It's about telling a teacher that your child was adopted and those elementary school family tree projects. If you bear with me, I'll explain both reactions.

I've written before that I have told the teachers at my childrens' preschools and schools that they were born in Russia (see "Hello Preschool, My Kid Was Born In Russia"). I believe that there are facts about my children that can influence their learning experience, and I want a teacher to know them. I want to know if a teacher is predisposed to think negatively about my child and to do everything I can to educate that teacher about the facts of adoption. I live in a small town with a small school system and even if I hadn't talked to every teacher, I'm sure by now they would all know. So far, with the exception of the preschool teacher from hell, I've had a very positive response from all my kids' educators. Some, I've even discovered, are part of the adoption triad.

As for the family tree project, I don’t think there's a single piece of homework that causes more angst. The multipart planet project last year was a snap by comparison. But here's the funny part: It doesn't just cause angst among the adoption crowd. I've watched parents struggling to map out, and explain to their kids, the impact of divorces and remarriages and family members they don't talk to any more.

So why was I enlightened and infuriated about this post?

The former first. There were some creative ideas about what to use in place of the baby photo that is often requested at school. Adoption.com member Michelle Kretzinger printed a picture of the Russian flag and put "I was born in Russia" and the child's birth date on it. She has also used her kids referral photos, with the caption "I came to America with my family on (date)". Last year, I made a photocopy of my older son's Russian birth certificate, and he put it on his timeline with a similar caption. And here's something that might give some of you comfort: When my son's class posted their projects in the hall at school, I noticed that several of them--by bio kids--didn't have baby pictures on them. My son told me the kids were too embarrassed to show their baby pictures!

But one poster revealed that she had been hit with the anti-adoption prejudice that is still all too common. And from her pediatrician no less! If it were me, I'd be on the computer finding a new doctor and reminding this clown of the American Medical Association's "Declaration of Professional Responsibility". In point number 3 of the declaration a doctor "solemnly pledges" to, and I quote, "Treat the sick and the injured with competence and compassion and without prejudice."

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