This is part 2 of my discussion about working full-time and being a mom. This is my current dilemma - to work or not to work - and I'm fortunate to have the choice, I know. But it doesn't make it an easy choice.

Part 1 is here. It was a general discussion about what I do right now as well as some of the problems with working full-time outside of the home.

Here are the good things I see about getting a full-time job:

One, the money. If I worked full time as a School Library Media... more

I was talking to a friend yesterday about something that Little J's been doing lately when he comes home from school: tantruming. Generally, about 15 minutes after he gets home something frustrates him to the point that he begins to weep and wail and gnash his teeth and generally sound pitiful. This goes on for about 20 minutes. It's quit unpleasant to listen to and any attempts to calm him down or get him to stop or to fix whatever it was that made him so upset don't work. After about 20 minutes, once he's gotten it out of his system, I can get him to stop. Then he's... more

So, a couple of days ago I told you all that my in-laws will be here soon (8 days to go!), but there's another important day also coming up this month: Family Day.

Family Day is a holiday I made up. Basically, it's around the time of the anniversary of Little J's adoption, which is what we're actually celebrating, but it's really an excuse to have a big party where we invite everyone we know to come over and have a good time. We have food, music, and a bonfire at night, and we also ask everyone to bring a little money to donate to whatever cause we want... more

Little J bites his nails. I mean, he really, really bites his nails. Past the quick. It looks horribly painful. I have never seen anyone's nails bitten that low before.

It's gotten worse since he's started the ADHD medication. I will talk to the doctor about it next week. I also suspect it has roots in Sensory Integration issues - but I got him other oral stimulation toys and he refuses to use them. I guess he prefers the pain.

So I need help. Did your child do this? What did you do?

I bit my own nails through my mid 20s and then I stopped.... more

After a bad sleep the night before we piled into the van and went back to the orphanage the next morning.

The weather that day was very much like the weather is today: clear, cool, breezy. It made me think of New England, where I spent a lot of my childhood. We were able to enjoy the drive out a little more than the drive the day earlier. We still had some anxieties but my decision, at least, had been made.

Yuri was brought to us outside this time, since it was so beautiful. We played on the playground outside the orphanage. I'm not sure that... more

We had just met the doctor, then we were taken to a playroom on the second floor of the orphanage where we waited, trying to be patient.

Then the door opened and in walked one of the caretakers holding a little boy in her arms. "Eta Yura," she said. This is Yura.

He came right to us. He wasn't shy at all. Now I know that he had attachment issues but then it was wonderful. After a minute or two the caretaker and our translator left and we were alone with him. I felt really excited and nervous. Was this our son?

Our video from that... more

Do you give your kids allowance?

If so, how much? And when did you start to do it?

The other day I posted a question about what to do when my children bicker and badger me. No one replied, which either means no one read it or your kids do the same thing to you and so you don't have an answer for me.

One of my friends makes her kids pay her whenever they do something annoying like that. Each infraction is a nickel or a quarter. Her kids are really into money... more

Russian "Love" stamp (c) Designs from the Heart.

Confession! I do not stamp or scrapbook. Well, Big J has a scrapbook that goes up until he's 6 months old and Little J has a box in which all of his stuff that I've always meant to put into a scrapbook goes...er, um, er...this is a bad mommy moment.

Anyway, I don't know if I'll ever get into the full-fledged scrapbook thing, but I obviously need to get off my flat behind and get something going for both of these boys.... more

This is not an adoption parenting dilemma…it’s a plain old parenting dilemma, and I could use some advice.

Picture this: yesterday my husband and I helped some friends who are getting ready to move and so our boys went to their grandparents for a couple of hours. When it was time to pick them up I left my husband and our friends’ house and went to get them. From the time they left Grandma and Grandpa’s house until the time we picked up Daddy it was bickering…constant. Unrelenting. Annoying.

I really, really tried not to get in the middle of it. I read somewhere that arguing is a bid for parental attention so if you give it to them it reinforces the situation. But was really,... more

This is continued from part 1, an introduction to therapeutic boarding schools.

Here's what I think you need to look for in a therapeutic boarding school:

1. Real high school level classes, but also remediation. Many times kids who've been struggling over the past few years are behind in school. You should pick a program that will help them catch up and will prepare them for college or whatever post-secondary training they're going for. From what I can tell this... more